"If it doesn't open, it's not your door."
I've had this quote as the screensaver on my phone for over a year now because every time I check my phone (which is pretty often), it reminds me that many things in life are out of my control.
As a perfectionist, I do need to remind myself of that regularly.
We all want things in life to turn out a certain way... OUR way... the way we think will bring us the most joy, pleasure, success, wealth, health ___________ (fill in the blank). Sometimes we REALLY think a certain situation is the best for us. It could be a job opportunity. A relationship. A certain type of diet. A house you want to buy. A particular workout program. All of these things represent possible doors that can lead to a future that you envision for yourself.
But somehow some of those things do not work out as you wanted. They don't go your way.
You were certain that house of your dreams in that amazing neighborhood was meant for you to live in... but you lose it to another buyer. You were certain that new diet you read about in a book was THE best eating plan for you... but you have trouble sticking to it and didn't lose weight. That new workout program you started didn't really change your body in the ways you envisioned. That job you really thought would be the best thing for you, gets offered to someone else.
Such is life. As much as we want things to go our way all the time, they don't. And really... it's okay. Because it means that situation was not meant for you. If it was your door, it would have opened.
Sometimes we have to let go of what we *think* is the best choice, and get psyched up about what new door the universe is leading us to. Sooner or later, you will find yourself in a new opportunity that will work out brilliantly and you'll look back at that door that slammed close in your face and understand.
What situations are you in right now that are not opening up for you? Let's say you really want to lose some weight or gain lean muscle mass before the holidays. If your eating habits suck and you are spending more time on the couch watching Netflix and eating ice-cream, then guess what?? That door is not going to open.
This doesn't mean giving up on your goal. What it DOES mean is that your current habits are not in alignment with that goal. It's like holding on to a set of keys that won't unlock a door, no matter how many times you jiggle them in the lock. Let go of those habits (throw away those keys) and find new habits... new keys that will open the right door. Think of each new habit as a key on your keychain that will unlock the doors to the life you want.
Stop struggling with doors that don't open. They are not meant for you. Whatever is going on in your life that is not working, let it go. This does NOT mean giving up and passively hoping for things to happen. It means proactively finding ANOTHER way... finding the right doors. When you start believing that you are being directed to what is truly meant for you, you arrive at that door sooner. And when you do arrive there you are super ready to fling it wide open.
KEYS that Open Doors
In your pursuit of success, health, wealth, happiness - move towards the doors that DO open and create a keychain of habits that will unlock them.
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Megan Ántoni Placa, MS, CNS